WE ARE BRIGHT PINK

Amy
In February 2005 I was a Senior at Boston University. I was interviewing for post-college jobs, balancing classes and internships, and planning my final spring break. I was also secretly monitoring a small lump I had found in my left breast. Some days I would feel the lump and other days I wouldn't. I did not have a doctor in Boston. I did not know where to turn for help. After about a month of watching this grow, I decided to go see a nurse practitioner at a health clinic near my school. She said I was only 21 years old. I had no family history of cancer, so even though the nurse felt a lump, she told me I didn't need an ultrasound or mammogram. My life was busy and I was relieved not to go for testing.

Four months later I had graduated, lined up a job, and moved into a new apartment. My mother came up to Boston to help me move into my new place and remarked on my wasted appearance. She also complained because I was sleeping 14 and 15 hours a day. When she heard I had a lump in my breast that hadn't gone away, but I never followed up with a mammogram, she freaked. My mother made me visit her doctor at home. After he felt some inflamed lymph nodes under my arm he recommended me for an ultrasound.

When I spent 3 hours at the breast imaging place I knew something was wrong. The ultrasound technician kept bringing in more doctors and nurses! After several anxious hours, a doctor came in to tell me I needed a biopsy. The doctor reassured me that this was merely a formality; they always biopsy lumps over a certain size. I was so reassured my boyfriend and I went to the beach, and I put the whole ordeal out of my head.

A week later, I was in line at Starbucks and my mother called. "Honey, the biopsy results are back. This is cancer…..Now your father and I have been talking and we really think you need to move back home. We need to take care of this." I found out I had breast cancer in line at Starbucks.

I moved home and was probably more upset about moving in with my parents than I was about my cancer! But then I was told I had Stage 4 cancer. During the four months I ignored my lump, the cancer had traveled to my liver. My new doctors told me my cancer was incurable. One doctor told me he didn't expect me to see my 30th birthday.

I found new doctors. I spent 5 months in chemotherapy. Then I had a "generous lumpectomy" followed by 3 months of radiation. I could have had a mastectomy, but my doctors thought it wouldn't increase my chances of survival. Why put me through such a serious surgery for no benefit? I wasn't sure if I was relieved or if that point of view was really depressing…

After radiation, I found out I needed to stay on several chemotherapy drugs for an indeterminate amount of time. Unlike other cancer patients, when you are Stage 4 you will never be cancer free.

I needed to stop putting my life on hold, and learn how to live life with cancer. I found my calling in breast cancer advocacy. I work with the Breast Cancer 3-Day, a 3-Day 60 mile walk that raised more than $60million last year for breast cancer research and education. I tell my story every day. I especially love speaking with college students.

Most of my peers will never have breast cancer, but every day I think about how my cancer experience would have changed if I had a doctor I could trust near my school. I would have spoken more freely about my fears, followed up with the doctor much sooner, and taken my health more seriously. I hope my story can help just one other college student handle their own health scare differently.